A wanderer’s life is a one of perpetual transition. I find myself constantly shifting between lives – letting go, letting in, holding on. Some people I want to hold onto, but life’s forcing me to let go. Some stories lay open and unfinished – leaving me wondering if I’ll get to write another page someday. Other tales survive life’s hard tests of time and distance – the chapters still unfolding; a story without an end.
It’s official. I’m leaving Japan. The past week has been a celebration of my past 3.5 years here. Since Friday night last week, it’s been one farewell party after the next. Old friends. New friends. Colleagues. Bosses. And so on and so forth. And the party isn’t over. The celebrations are still in motion. There’s lamb slow-cooking on the stove as I write this.
A heart that doesn’t know how to forgive is a heart that hurts.
“Go on then Great Wanderer,” the voice whispers. “Jump.”
My first Saturn Return was a time of boundaries and blockages, of breakdowns and breakups, and of stagnation and strife. Like a harsh teacher from hell, Saturn came down on my 7th and 10th houses like a ton of bricks. Everything I had, knew and was came crashing down. There were so many days I felt like I was crawling through a dark lonely tunnel where there would be no light at the end of it all. But as I look back now – I realise that I spent those three and a half years building a foundation that’s solid, resilient and tough.
You take the mini spatula and slowly slide a little bit over the hot plate till it’s brown and slightly crunchy. You have to do it a little at a time and very very slowly if you want to get the desired results – slightly burnt and crunchy baby food. The whole experience is pretty damn mendoksai troublesome. When I take my first bite, I like it. The flavours are fairly mild so we douse it with chilli flakes, seaweed and fish flakes. It takes us close to an hour to get through the first one.
The Sun is the 19th card in the major arcana. It’s a card that represents finally seeing the light again after a long dark tunnel. It’s about re-finding that part of yourself that’s untouched and unmarked by pain, loss and suffering. The Sun is the Soul. Unlike the transient nature of our human experience, the soul is eternal, unwavering, constant.