I look back at a past that is long gone
I think of you
And how you came into my life
Tied together by Destiny’s thread
Did I choose it?
Would I have chosen it?
Did you choose it
Would you have chosen it?
Do we ever even get to decide?
I remember the cups that we shared
I remember the cups that we spilled
The careless words exchanged
As we parted our separate ways
Sometimes it was me
Sometimes it was them
A dark scar over every happy memory
Sometimes I wonder
What it would be like to go back
But then I remember
That dark scar
The one that spoiled it all
But it wasn’t always this way
How did something so beautiful
Turn so bad
But it’s all over now
And all that’s left are memories
They come and go in waves
Incoherent
Murky
Muddy
As though it were all a dream
A part of me wished it
Could have lasted
But we never know
We’re not meant to
And then you wake up one morning
Next to someone new
Another city
Another place
But the old histories
How quickly they repeat themselves
You hope it’ll be different this time
You hope it’ll be better this time
You hope it’ll last this time
Instead of washing away
In that endless stream
The one that takes you
Along with it
Leaving you stranded
Wondering what’s next
Wondering what happened
And if it’ll finally be okay someday
We search for something that eludes us
We look for real love
And find the illusion instead
Something built on dreams
Sandcastles
That get washed away
And you wake up the next day
Alone
Again
You reach out for someone
That’s no longer there
Someone who’ll never be there again
So you get on with your life
Remembering the loss
The cups you shared
And the cups you spilled
And then at the moment you least expect it
It all begins again.
(Author’s note: I first read Daytripper by Fabio Moon and Gabriel Ba in Melbourne some eight years ago. The graphic novel was a gift from my friend Tal for my birthday. The images stuck with me. This morning, I remembered the novel and re-read it. It awakened in me something that I hadn’t felt for a long time. Their story inspired me to write my own.)
