It’s tough being a woman, isn’t it? We have to go to work so we can provide for our family. When we’re not at work, we come home to a million things that need our attention. Cooking, cleaning and making sure the youngest one doesn’t accidentally start chewing on a crayon while you’re not looking…Hmm…
I know how tough it can be.
It’s a challenge the Queen of Pentacles knows all too well. She is the epitome of what society expects women to be in these modern times. She strikes that work-life balance. She does what she needs to do to maintain order, structure and stability in her family’s life.
Her life is a structured routine of meeting day to day responsibilities. And for the most part, things work. But something is missing… She can’t remember the last time she just let go. The Queen of Pentacles gazes intently at the coin in her hand. She’s afraid that if she drops it for just one second her life will fall apart.
But will it? Will it really?
The coin is made of metal – not glass. It can survive many things.
The Queen of Pentacles loves her family. She worries constantly about whether everything is going to be alright. In taking care of everyone else, she has forgotten that once upon a time she was a passionate woman with her own goals. Her own agenda. Her own dreams.
Once upon a time… she thinks as she stares at the coin that she refuses to drop. The Queen of Wands shows up in reverse.
She reminds us that when we put the needs of everyone else first and put ourselves second – we inevitably end up feeling bitter towards the people in our lives. And bit by bit, we begin losing the confidence we once had. We become frustrated. Our energy levels decrease and we become irritable, annoyed and resentful. We know that this is not who we truly are, but we can’t see a way forward… So we indulge in nostalgia.
Once upon a time, I was…
There is what is. And what isn’t. The Queen of Wands knows better than to indulge in nostalgia. She lives life in the moment. She reaches forward and grabs the Ace of Wands – where all things begin. Like the hand in the Ace of Wands, we must reach out and take initiative to get what we want. If we keep living within the confines of our structures, worries and routines – nothing will ever change.
To get in touch with what we really want – we must be willing go within. Spend some alone time with our thoughts so we can differentiate who we are from who the world expects us to be. Spend 20 minutes meditating daily. Connect with yourself. Discover what makes you tick. Take yourself out on a solo date once a week. Do what makes you happy.
Solitude teaches us to listen and follow that gentle voice inside us that is gently guiding us to be the best we can be. It is only then that we can discover what brings us joy.
It is when the world is asleep and the moon is shining that the Queen of Pentacles finally lays down her coin and gets the chance to be herself. She breathes in and out. For just a few hours – she is no one’s wife, mother, daughter or sister. She is herself.