Last week, I had my 30th birthday planned. I was super duper excited. I was finally leaving the mistaken-ridden-experimental 20s behind. Hip hip hooray! I had already started pre-celebrating when I got a phone call. I hung up cursing and swearing. My company was sending me out to an assignment in my old neighbourhood: a place I hated and wouldn’t even recommend to my worst enemy.
There go my big plans.
The Wheel of Fortune
To me, that situation is what the Wheel of Fortune tarot card is all about. This card is not about some cliche pot of gold at the end of some rainbow. This card is about those moments when life decides to thrust changes upon us without even bothering with a ‘pretty please’. Yea, IT SUCKS.
Fortunately, we do get to choose how to react in those circumstances. If it’s a ‘bad’ experience, we need to cut our losses and move on. If it’s a ‘good’ experience, we should enjoy it as best we can. We never know when another annoying phone call will show up to wreck the day.
This card is just SO FULL of imagery from so many cultures that I simply can’t go through all of it. For today, what I really want to focus on are the four mythical animals on the corners of the card. They represent the fixed signs: Taurus, Aquarius, Scorpio and Leo. So much of the world is fixed – decided well before we are born. Privileged or underprivileged – we ALL still need to play the game of life with the cards it has dealt us.
Ultimately, the wheel always turns again.
The Queen of Cups
Which brings me to the second card of my reading: The Queen of Cups – ruled by the element of water. I’ve seen this card in so many readings. Whilst it generally has a positive connotation, seeing it in my own reading made me go ICK ICK ICK. She reminds me of my younger self. Someone who would follow her heart over her head at every single turn.
The Queen of Cups is the nurturer. She is sensitive, compassionate and generous with those she cares about. When she’s on her own – she’s introspective, intuitive and dreamy. With her friends she is easygoing and warm-hearted – that person who’s only ever a phone call away if you need something. You know the type. At her core – the Queen of Cups is spiritual, knowledgable and empathetic.
I’ve always believed that sensitive people suffer more than logical people. We feel our emotions more deeply and intensely. In some respects, my life’s been far more painful than many of my peers. But now that I’m older, I think that logical people tend to stay in bad situations way longer than sensitive people. Since logical people can distance themselves from their emotions, they never get down and out the way we do. And since they never truly get ‘down’ they never quite get ‘out’ of bad situations.
Having said that – the Queen of Cups just isn’t discriminating enough. Yes, she has these gifts that draw people to her – but she doesn’t have the life experience to really know how to utilise her gifts in the real world. Like the Queen of Cups, I’m always going to sensitive and emotional. That was how the Wheel of Fortune was set when I came into this world. But these days, I see the big picture and know there’s no point in emptying my cup if there isn’t a refill on offer.
Which brings me to my last card.
The High Priestess
It brought me enormous pleasure to draw this card on my 30th birthday. It’s my favourite tarot card. Hey, I can’t help it. I like what I like.
The High Priestess is still highly intuitive and emotional like the Queen of Cups, but she’s not a nurturer anymore. She’s evolved from being an emotional and spiritual provider to a wise teacher. The High Priestess is who the Queen of Cups becomes when she acquires the experience with which to properly use her gifts of knowledge and empathy in the real world.
The High Priestess uses the experience she accumulated as the Queen of Cups to bring her and those around her to greater heights than she ever would have achieved as a nurturer. After all, it is she who guards the sacred Torah.
You could not pay me to go back to my naive, inexperienced and foolish 20s. The Wheel of Fortune has indeed turned in my favour. I live in an apartment and a neighbourhood that I love. Work is generally good. I’m writing fantasy again. I have a lot of love in my life. Having gone through the opposite, I appreciate what I have now. I don’t know what the Wheel of Fortune will bring next, but I’m excited about my 30s.
Bye bye 20s. You will not be missed.